walking with heels -pilot -part 2

dear whoever/whatever
I always taught women who wore heels are totally confident and poised. I never taught would get in those shoes, but some how I managed, during the auditions, even though it was a lil bit of an embarrassment, but i still walked with hells :) . I have this body imbalance thing in me, that i feared might come into effect with the help of a 3 inch heels,but i managed to overcome tht too..so JAI HO!!..
like I said in the previous post, I am not that fair lady or girly girl, I am clumsy and careless. I have a terrible eye sight problem, acne and u can name it. I love black eyeliner and can never live without it.so thats me
So like in the previous post, I mentioned about going for the college model angels (CMA) audition, It was on a Sunday(7th June 09), I had a few papers to complete the following weekday, and the paper ended on Friday. After getting off one the mot terrifying paper that Wednesday, macro econs 4(the killer) ,I came to get some sleep, before I had to start preparing (last minute) for my final paper, macro econs 3 (another killer!!). As I finally dozed off after answering so many calls from vinod, I had this message coming in, I was pissed off. Wouldn’t this ppl just give me a break???
I took up my Motorola razor v3xx, to check the message; it was from an unknown number saying ‘congrats u are the top finalist for cma..Bla bla’. This is a prank, I told myself. I have too many suspects who might just want to get off the hook, so yea..Am going to sleep again, but I still sent vnd a message saying I got the message and what I actually feel about the message.
The next day (Thursday 11june 09), I kept the message very low, I still feared for macro econs, and was studying, I couldn’t help it, so I called my friend sarveena who was also a pr for the event, and she said the message was for real. I went for my favorite club’s, meeting; inti vybes, the one and only broadcasting radio station of inti, being part of it was dream and a blessing, (feeling real guilty that I couldn’t do the board.) the news exploded in the studio and everyone got to know that I was on the top 40 list. I was so shy and didn’t know how to handle or react to it.
But the members of vybes were another chapter of encouragement, everyone, Horus, Nicole, sarveena, sarath, bean, Claudine... (Sorry if I have missed out any one of u), were all encouraging and that actually boost me up .I called my mom and she got even excited about it..She was asking me to talk about the whole event on the phone,(Another surprising factor), I was glad that the ‘queen of my hearts’, held me up with lotsa encouragement..above all of this, vinod had to go to Malacca for his final year project research to the eye of Malaysia, and suddenly he calls me saying that there is extra place in the car, and he said I could come, I got so excited, I called up ventz to join us and we drove off together to Malacca to see the ‘eye of Malaysia’- it’s a Ferris wheel, that is brought all over Malaysia. It was like the best day, I had an exam the next day, but I was so happy (hope that doesn’t affect the results, or its not some symbolic thing or something). So we went to see the eye of Malaysia, I had no idea how big it was, but I only enjoyed the part where me, vinod and ventz (after a long time, since bad luck struck upon us ) had another ‘sasau- get –together’ and vinod’s group mate naveenan followed too.
I was so tired, believe me, and I had to prepare for the paper, I stood up the whole night trying to get at least a few things into my head.
I manage to complete a my paper the following day, vinod,me,ventz and tulsi went out shopping for some clothes for my shoot the next day with cma. I was satisfied. .. yet was still 50/50 about tomorrow. I don’t have any friends, going to subang all alone, not literally, but …sarveena couldn’t make it, I told my friends I would just probably sleep off...But do u think they’re going to agree to this…’u’ll go to the grave if u do so’ they say…and vinod... was the only one without a perfect answer or a firm say… and theeban as usual..Being another huge supporter and another person who would kick my butt if I don’t go.. And mom was just worried I might get off the hook and forget my roots..But any how u guys were..i want to thank u all..i noe deep down, that u guys want the best for me..And I love u all for it 

lets just wait and see..where is this gonna lead
From the heart –
I have rise indeed...Again...this time...i rised because of the wonderful people around me, I rised cause of the beautiful friends and souls around me...u can put me into a mess...or many others...but I shall rise again...Because of the people around me...And also the almighty himself...
Sincere thanks to the members of inti vybes, ventz, vinod, theeban, tulsi, amma, chuaci for showing me lotsa love

walking with heels-pilot

Dear whoever/whatever

I just wanted to share off the first ever experience of this thing I had

Face me!! Am not the girly girl who wears heals and does pedicure and who worries how her nails would look…

But CMA- college model angels 2009, made me realize that..cat walk wasn’t only meant for professional models

I always had this part in my life where people criticized my walk. Some say its so like a ‘mother of two’, some say its so masculine, some says its pure gangsta, sum say its cool, some say its scary…

‘owhh..Come what May ‘...

‘Let them say what they want’

I taught at one point. I stopped being bothered and got fed up My walk wasn’t part of the judgment list, well..Not in an everyday life at least. If this was bad.. They should have seen my walk when I was in school. I might not be the favorite lady but I know I am still a good friend. Well all said and done, I was overcoming sum tragedies I had been facing since the beginning of the semester. Too much for a 21 year old, I was suppose to be free this year...And having fun...What happened to all those traditions and stuffs?? No comments..

But some how I managed to get myself into auditioning for cma, thanks to sarveena, ventz, theeban,tulsi and vinod (being here and there)..even my mom was ok about it..and she sonded excited on the phone,(my mom..was totally unbelievable that day,i didnt expect here to be excited,i taught i might just end up getting fired..)..Me and tulsi went in together.. And I had 0% hope to get selected..Mainly..Because the so called gangsta walk I have..i no choice..no heels..i told my mom..And she borrowed me one of her favorite pair..When I wore those shoes I told myself ‘think amma. Walk amma’..i never met any other confident lady, in person like my mom..She inspires me in most of the ways, except for a few that..Well I have to admit…I really cant take as an example..But..She made me...in to a baby and now a full grown lady..So If I fail to walk without falling... (Owh..Did I even mention? That I am really careless…I often fall and hurt myself, sometimes I get scratches and bruises without realizing and knowing where I got them from..That’s how I had to get my feet stitched… careless) I am so going to put her down cause she was like the best high-heel walker for me..And looking at her size..She even dances with heels..Ow..Enough of mom..Can’t stop if I start. So I went in...Feeling really dumb about my self. And yea..As assumed, the judges said ‘Ur not used to heels aren’t u?’ so it as obvious..i had to admit, am not used to this.i didn't fall though..just that..i dunno..its that thing inside that always tells u the truth..like wen u dun do well in Ur exams,every one else says something positive,but this thing called conscious makes u realize the truth?? that conscious thing hit me big time,i knew myself. So I went out, relieved and ashamed at the same time for not being able to walk perfectly,i was ashamed for not being a lady or a female dam,bet children would walk better then i did,i felt like a circus chimp.. but then again,i just joined the audition for fun,no chances of getting in for sure..i was sure I wouldn’t make it,so wat if am an amateur high 'heeler'.(if this description really exist),there was a free photo shoot anyways…I mean 2 free photo shoots..don't wanna screw up that part.

‘Enough of cam whoring, lets hit professional photographers’ *wink*

So I threw away my long face and held up a cheerful look, don’t want to spoil those pictures. I went in and had a heck of a time. I totally brought it out.lol. And this is what It turned out.

And you could tell if I enjoyed myself… I dun care whats gonna happen..as long as I have the experience…like in antm :P..but the judges of cma were all darlings..they were so friendly and so encouraging..it was not like a competition at all…it was like a friendly meeting or something,nothing like I expected…diva’s and all…I liked it..loved the experience…

from the heart-

for me..

like the descrption of the blog

all those mess i had to go through in the month of may may,the begining of the semester, had a break during this time.. i have rise from the mess indeed,even though it was just for a while...it was still worth while..and a few more yet to come, u may want to put me down.. but a minority's say doesnt change the world's opinion,

i cant avoid you critiques or your doings, but at the same time,i cannot avoid the almighty's doings as well and so cant you..i trust 'him' and not you

and u cant really see beautiful and perfect critiques around, coz these critiques never really saw their flaws

so critiques- u don bring me down